I'm taking a break from our political weekend discussion and will shared with everyone my "Sure-to-be-popular" plan for welfare reform in tomorrow's posting. I was going to do it today, but I had a conversation with my daughters that made me rethink today's topic.
I asked them why we had off today. Their answer was very complete, as they parroted back their school lesson that "MLK was a great peace keeper who worked hard to gain equal rights for all people." "If it wasn't for him," my ten year old continued "then I wouldn't be able to be friends with black people." Interesting interpretation - if not for MLK, she couldn't have black friends. I wasn't about to get into a conversation regarding the superficiality of that statement - she is 10, and more naive than we give our 10-year-olds credit for. We sometimes lose track of the development of our children, and forget how we were at 10. It did bring us to a deep conversation about the perpetuation of our differences and possibly our prejudices. She didn't know that's what we were talking about. She just thought we were talking about school and her friends, which my wife and I do often.
I have always enjoyed history, and continue to consume it as a reader, perpetuate it as a writer, and can't get enough of it as a viewer, but sometimes I wonder what the value of recognizing the wrongs of generations past has for our children. Does studying the plight of segregation, that was not part of my own upbringing, have any validity in our current generation's lives? I was in elementary school, in Newark, in the 70's. With the Alexander v. Holmes County BOE ruling OFFICIALLY ending segregation in public schools (which was different from the separate but equal ruling garnered from Brown v. BOE of 1955) this victory and the rest of the Civil Rights Movement were as fresh to the adults in my young generation as the end of Vietnam to the next elementary school set, and the end of the cold war, Desert Storm, 9-11, and the first black president, would be for generations that would follow. Interestingly to note, if you ask an elementary school child about these events, their knowledge would have been or would be superficial generalizations of subjective opinions garnered from overhearing their parents talk.
Elementary school children are not of an age where they "care" about political or other worldly issues. They care about being happy and having friends and fitting in with their peers. You may be lucky, as my wife and I are, to have children who are sensitive to the needs of families who have less than we do, and to the mistreatment of animals. That is probably the most political insight or social change we can expect from our second and fourth grader. They feel bad for the kids in Haiti, but don't understand its impact from a global and/or societal standpoint. AND WHY SHOULD THEY. . . . THEY ARE KIDS!! Allow them to be kids and enjoy the wonder of being a child, while instilling in them the Golden Rule - Do Unto Others, As You'd Like Done Unto You. We teach them to be nice.
My girls are friends with children of various backgrounds - including, but not limited to, religious, family heritage, and skin tone. It is interesting to note that when they described their friends to me, they would never say "the black kid" the Indian Kid" "the Jewish girl" or "the Asian boy." They would say my friend from class, soccer, dance, or whatever they were involved in. When asked to describe their friend, it would take the third or fourth descriptor that would possibly give you the idea that they were of a different culture. They saw the kids as other kids - not as categories.
SO WHY TEACH THEM ABOUT DIFFERENCES? Kids ARE Kids.
I think it is important for us to respect and pay homage to the deeds and impact great people have had on society; however, instead of taking a day off from learning and discussing, lets have a special day of recognition and impact. Let's not have a day off of work/school, lets have a special "Day ON" at work/school.
I remember being a 28 year old supervisor proposing this at a meeting. Mind you I was 15 years the junior of any other person in my position, so it must have come across as the rantings of some young upstart. The superintendent, principals and other supervisors and I were going over the development of the master schedule for the following year, when I said, lets end or begin school a couple days later in September or earlier in June and pick up a couple of the random days like Presidents' Day, Columbus Day or MLK. The truth was, I liked teaching and thought it was more difficult to recover from a random off day then it was to have the kids coming in as usual. The day after and the Friday before Memorial Day (or any Monday holiday) was always difficult because of the excitement of the extra day off, the restart after a hiccup in the routine, and the impending four-day work week. Those of you who have been or are classroom teachers understand this energy. You would think I asked everyone to give up their paychecks. I must have been CRAZY. You then knew who the skiers were, who I was asking to give up an extra day on the slopes in January and February =). I did receive support from the Social Studies and English Supervisors, who saw the benefit of a special "Day On." They had MUCH more influence than I did and took the ball and ran with it, and the master schedule had a special day "ON" for MLK day - which was an optional day at the time. The skiers were pissed, but the educators were not. We held a day that in each class we discussed topics like fortitude, self-awareness, trust, tolerance, . . . etc. We discussed writings of those who made change and crusaded on behalf of others. The supervisors lead their team of teachers through wonderful activities allowing the students to apply their academics in tangible ways.
Later on, as a principal, I had the same opportunity to have a "Day On" for Veterans Day, where we offered activities that explored heroism and selflessness. It ended up being one of the greatest days in my educational carer.
Today, when you sit and talk with your children about their day, why not discuss the importance of the spirit of MLK. Don't discuss the plight of the blacks during the early-mid 20th Century. Don't put the idea that we have differences - because we really don't - into their heads. We are all humans . We are all Americans. The likes of AL Sharpton has made a career on keeping us separated - perpetuating the spirit of separation that plagued America during the 60's - 50 years ago - and not the innocence of what our children are experiencing, where kids are just kids, not a color, a race or a creed.
Let's think about having "Days ON" with our children, if our schools won't support us, and conform with the politicos who make the schedules. Let's celebrate:
Columbus Day by discussing or exploring new places with our children.
MLK Day by figuring out how we can use our lives to help others.
President's Day and Memorial Day by taking time to appreciate the great country we share and to find a way we can help perpetuate the positive qualities that keeps us the greatest country in the world.
We should not spotlight what separates us. On the contrary, we should appreciate and honor our differences as unique parts of the spectrum that makes up America. We are not a melting pot, but a spectrum of colors that should stand as the rainbow our children and grand children will someday travel over.
Happy MLK Day. Hope your dreams are clear to you today, and you get an opportunity to discuss with your friends, children, or neighbors his legacy.
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