Lessons from Oz

I had an interesting conversation last night with a man who is trying to develop an educational program that promotes the progress and impact that urban centers of our country have had on the America we live in today. I found it both inspiring and thought provoking. The 90 minute conversation seemed to go by in a blink.

The conversation led me to discuss with him my views on courage. When I think of the word "courage", it is hard to not have one of my top three favorite movies of all time, The Wizard of Oz, pop into my mind. In addition to the music and story, I always appreciated the characters and how each of us has a little bit of the Scarecrow, Tin Man, Lion, and even Dorothy and Wizard in us.

We sometimes act without thinking - not following our hearts, but conforming out of fear of the expectations of others, while hiding behind a mask as we search for an ideal that doesn't really exist. How's that for a mouthful of an amalgamation of the Oz characters?

As outlandish as it sounds, most of us either unconsciously, or through fear, have become programmed to do just that.

How many of us do things because "We have to," or "It is how we've always done it," or "It is what is expected of me?" We use the word "tradition" to justify our inability to do what we really want to do. We place guilt on ourselves if we don't conform, and in the long run, we spend another day just going along with the crowd. . . .unfulfilled.

If we used our BRAINS to recognize that living up to other's expectations is not what is truly in our HEARTS, then we would have the COURAGE to be our own person and not hide behind the MASK of conformity, and truly have our "HEART'S DESIRE."

The extraordinary people we admire did/do just that. They became EXTRA-ORDINARY because they had the courage to follow their own dreams, while having a strong sense of self (high self-esteem), they controlled their experiences and their lives, and they did not settle for outcomes that were not in alignment with their vision.

I am not recommending that we shirk our responsibilities to our children, our businesses, or communities. However, I am saying that we can be responsible individuals while making sure that our own needs are being met.

There is nothing sadder to me than the countless women I have spoken to who feel they lost their identity when they became mothers, or the men who continue to go to a miserable job, eight-plus hours a day, like drones in the great anthill or beehive of life. These people live their lives for others without thinking of their own needs, and how meeting these needs might positively impact every aspect of their lives. It takes great planning (intellect - BRAINS), HEART, and COURAGE, to maintain your commitment to your family, business, or community, while making your own contentment a priority.

When you do that, your make your place within those three areas stronger and your contribution becomes more rewarding to you and everyone around you. I am fortunate that I have a wife that not only broke herself out of her feelings of being marginalized (losing her identity), but she had the COURAGE to encourage me to leave the safety of public education to pursue this crazy life I currently live. She is a wonderful role model for our two daughters. I can tell you (as would she) that our life at times is a rollercoaster; however, throughout the struggles, we know that we are fighting our own battles, our own wars, and setting an example to our children that ANYTHING is possible if you have the COURAGE to dream.

What would happen if you did what you wanted to do? What would happen if you had the COURAGE to not conform? What would happen if you didn't feel guilty for "indulging" yourselves in something that would make you happy?

Well. . . . You might just be happy.